[12 piece bucket]

It gets U-G-L-Y!!!!

After reading the title to this thread I now truly understand . . .

I NEED TO PURCHASE A LIFE!!!!!!

While you dorkballios were doing your thing . . . I was doing my own thang at a wedding for this fat chick that my wife trotted me out to. I was drinkin' barley sodaz, eatin' chickin' and makin' it happen on the dance floor with the Sprinkler, the Lawn Mower, the modified Lawn Mower Chicken, the Q-tip, the Diggin' Taterz, the Weedeater, the Chainsaw, the Mongoloid, Kung-Fu Fightin', the Wheelchair, the Eat Fly Dookie and Pass It, the Po-Go Stick and many more. All you gotta do is play Brick House and I just act a fool. Fat girls know how to eat and party gooooooood!!!!

I even went white water raftin' in the back woods of Tennissippi or some such state . . . . it was a state of genetic experiment gone bad really bad . . . I was just waiting for the banjo music to start up and the squeelin' to begin . . . I do bear slight resemblance to Ned Betty. SUUUUUUUWEEEEEEEE!!!

So now I guess I'm back to my day job of being the biggest nonprofessional internet goober in the whole galaxy . . . sad . . .

But when things get soooo bad that you can't even turn on Springer and feel better about who you are . . . . I just think . . .

"Man I could be like that Mike Oberdorkerwhathisname . . . "

Then it's ALL BETTER.